The emotional impact of domestic violence is immense, this goes without saying. The financial impact can be devastating, but these two factors combined make it incredibly difficult for a woman attempting to start a new life independently to meet the challenges she must face.
The darkness inside can be overwhelming, especially at night when the distractions quiet down. That's when the fear comes back the strongest. Entangled and spiraling with the fear come the overwhelming sense of hopelessness, confusion, dread and grief.
Grief? You ask...
Yes grief.
Grief for a life she had once had such hopes for, a future bright in her eyes,that now lies decimated and ruined.
Grief for the optimistic and trusting woman she once was, now so fearful and shut down.
Grief for the aspirations she had for her children and a happy family, now caught in the middle.
Grief for the outgoing and bubbly personality who now can't even make eye contact.
Most assume that because she has left that abusive relationship that she can now be happy. Well, surely it's all behind her now...
Wrong.
It is not over when you leave, because you can't leave behind the trauma. It stays in your body, messes with your mind and erodes your soul.
Those who are able to begin to re-establish themselves in a new home face new challenges...
How to create financial stability whilst working alone through such an overwhelming emotional and psychological quagmire?
How to keep on top of the rent, bills, groceries, kids needs and stretch the budget to a little entertainment, all on a single income?
How to be there for the kids at the same time as giving 100% in a job?
How to care for yourself and heal when there's not enough time or money?
How to keep your head above water when you're swimming against the tide...
Women escaping domestic violence make up 40% of the homeless population of Australia. They rely on refuges and emergency accommodation, their fiends or family members. They sleep in their cars and can often end up on the streets. This is not acceptable.
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I have the privilege of serving and creating a vision for healing trauma on Yuggera and Yugembeh Lands. I give deep gratitude and offer respect to the local Elders of the community of which I am proud to be a part. I honour their generosity, wisdom and leadership. May we all learn and integrate the ancient knowledge available through human connection.
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